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Sunday, October 21, 2012

Eyeball, Chair

Rachel and the NPV had three couples and me over last night to celebrate one of the couples recent wedding, which few of us were able to attend, it having taken place two time zones away. We all brought snacks, and the new bride, Serena, made kettle corn for us.  Her husband, Lad, ate a large quantity of it, and also of Serena's wonderfully fudgy brownies.  I understand now how it is possible to gain 15 lbs. in one's first year of marriage! 

A couple of years ago, I acquired a carved Victorian chair with casters on the front at one of the first estate sales I worked. I spent the whopping sum of $12.50 (plus tax) on this thing, whose upholstery, well, kindly put, was a disaster. I had grand plans for it.  First, I'd remove the casters and get my brother to raise the front legs. Then, I would reupholster it, turning it glorious.  It didn't turn out like that.  First, everyone else in my family hated the chair, which spent months in my parents' garage after my brother declared he'd do no surgery on it.  Eventually, I decided to haul it back to DC, where I paid a local woodworker to fix the legs. Fifty dollars for the shoddiest workmanship I've seen. I would have done better with an ax. (My family would say "yes, you should have taken an ax to the chair"). Be that as it may, I recently acquired a better chair, and have no further need for this Frankenstein's monster in the corner of my living room. So, I put it into this weekend's sale.  In the basement, to be exact, with a $35 price tag on it.  And this afternoon, when we were closing down, I found out that it had been stolen!  There was only one way out of the basement (through the house), and someone had nicked the bloody thing.  Of all the stuff to abscond with... 

I went to the young people's evening church service today, since I'd only made it to Sunday school, not worship, this morning.  It was a really good lesson on Job, though introduced by the overly enthusiastic little staff person who burbled about the total awesomeness of the speaker to an embarrassing extent (a trait she demonstrated two weeks ago as well--I am not exactly sure how to respond to her bubbly boilerplate "welcome newcomer" email to me asking me to have coffee. I think I might be tempted to squelch her, and unreasonable, almost idiotic cheer is simply her personality type--I shouldn't begrudge her. It would be like kicking a puppy.)  Afterwards, I spotted Serena and Lad on the other side of the room and went over to harass them.  I was joking around about being a senior citizen, laid up by various ailments, when Lad remarked, with total sincerity, that it reminded him of when our former senior pastor's eyeball fell out.  Serena and I both looked at him in shock--"When did this happen?!"  "You know," he said, "When he got a detached cornea or something and had to spend six weeks in bed."  I just about died laughing.  Assured him that a detached retina was in no way similar to having your eyeball fall out.  Ahh, young friends. Old friends. We are all goofy together.

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